I think I need to go home. When I'm lost and without direction, a weekend at my Daddy's often heals my broken sense of spirit. In the quiet woods of my childhood backdrop, I often find the answers that I seek. Without words, it's almost as if I have a conversation with my youngest self; the one that never leaves, perhaps the one who was left behind. I hope someone lets her know I'm on my way.
Tonight I will try to let go of some of my bitter at the gym. I need to sweat and burn and hurt just a little. I have to let go of these feelings or they will take me down and I'll never get up again. I don't think I'm supposed to go that way.
The Professor and I spoke of spending time together this weekend but without any word from him, I don't think that's in the plans. I love the way I feel when I'm close to him but I feel so terrible in his absence that it hardly makes it worth it. I asked God to remove him or make sense of him but not to leave me in suspense of him anylonger.
It is growing obvious that the one I seek and what I seek are not one in the same.
Your words are the sweetest and most musical magic. They're so beautiful, that even when you speak of Things Painful, you make them sound lovely and desirable.
ReplyDeleteThe little girl inside you radiates like sun through the purest crystal. She has definitely not been left behind.
How lovely that you can retreat to the safety and comfort of "Daddy". I wish...
I do believe we are kindred spirits. I look forward to learning more about you and I'm eager to soak up every glorious word you write.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. xx